What is a men’s cuddling group? Is cuddling a good form of therapy? Can men cuddle as a form of support? If you are interested in taking a deep dive into the world of men’s cuddling groups, this article has all the information you need.
Hi. My name is Sean Galla. I am a men’s support group facilitator with over ten years of experience. Part of my facilitating journey has been overseeing men’s support groups and offering helpful information to help men in their life journey. If you are interested in learning more about men’s cuddling groups and their benefits, I have put together this article detailing everything you need to know to make it easier to consider this form of support group.
In this article, you will learn everything you need to know about men’s cuddling groups.
Table of Contents:
What Is a Men’s Cuddling Group?
For a few years now, half a dozen men from different sexual orientations have gathered in a Plymouth meeting in Pennsylvania, twice a month to attend group support meetings that help them address and work through their traumas. Unlike other popular men’s support groups, the support method chosen by this particular group of men is cuddling. While this may seem odd, especially for men, the Men’s Therapeutic Cuddle Group members vouch for the cuddling method, saying it has helped them shed down their walls and confront everything holding them back, from childhood abuse to a family loss.
A men’s cuddling group is a type of support group where men learn to embrace physical touch through cuddling as part of the support process and healing journey.
In today’s world, the traditional ideas of what a man is and manhood are constantly receiving criticism with terms such as toxic masculinity becoming widely popular thanks to women empowerment movements like MeToo. A men’s cuddling group aims to interest men in a new way of expressing themselves.
Scott Turner, a founder of a cuddling group, aims to dispel the common belief that showing emotions or vulnerability as a man is a sign of weakness. Through cuddling, men can be vulnerable around other men and learn to allow others into their personal space without it making them any less of men. Scott believes that men require an emotional vocabulary to be able to be emotionally sensitive to the needs of others.
A men’s cuddling group aims to help men learn and understand that physical touch can extend beyond sex or aggression. In these groups, men learn that platonic affection is possible and can be used as a doorway to emotional closeness amongst men.
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How a Men’s Cuddling Group Works
At the beginning of the cuddling session, members are required to agree not to engage in any sexual touch. Members are also required to ask for consent from their cuddling partner before every action. Members then gather in a huddle and breathe meditatively.
The cuddling process starts with men pairing up for what is referred to as the “the motorcycle hold.” This is a type of hold where one man sits and leans his back against the chest of the cuddling partner, which looks like taking a motorcycle ride together.
Members can massage their partner’s shoulders or hands with consent and even stroke the other person’s beard. After a 15-minutes session, the members are required to switch to a new partner. This marks the first half of the cuddling session.
For the second half of the session, the men cuddle as one large group in what is referred to as a “puppy pile.” In this pile, men lay with their heads in one another’s laps, chatting and joking. Kevin Eitzenberger, a cuddling group co-founder, terms this as a safe space where men can come address their past traumas, and feel safe enough to share their innermost thoughts. In a cuddling group, members find a free space to be vulnerable, away from their life challenges and societal expectations that force them to play the role of strong providers.
In a cuddling group, men learn that it is ok to be a little broken.
At the end of the meetings, the group of men huddle together and take turns completing phrases where they say how they feel in turn.
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Men Cuddling Groups and Vulnerability
TJ McDonnell, a member of a cuddling group, was a sexual abuse victim to his neighbor as a child. He kept this secret to himself for years, living in shame, thinking it happened to him because he had done something wrong. This caused him to experience loneliness as he kept his distance from people growing up. McDonnell explains having issues connecting with people, even his siblings. According to him, going to therapy and attending therapy group sessions helped him deal with what happened. However, it is only in a cuddling group that he allowed himself to heal and learn that emotional intimacy and physical touch do not always lead to abuse.
A cuddling group is a place where men come to experience vulnerability. A men’s cuddling group aims to redefine masculinity and heal trauma. According to Chris Liang, a psychologist and associate professor at Lehigh University, men’s cuddling groups are healthy for men and women.
Chris Liang is a researcher on how masculinity impacts health and was part of a board that worked with the American Psychological Association to create new guidelines on working with boys and men. These guidelines highlight how traditional views on masculinity can harm men’s emotional, physical and mental health.
According to studies, men who conform to masculine norms of being tough and never showing weakness as the true mark of manhood or the only way to get the title of a man are unlikely to seek preventative healthcare and are more prone to alcoholism and drug use. This negative masculinity holds the men back from seeking any form of health care, including mental health services.
At least 90% of homicide cases in the US are men, with 77% of homicide victims being men. Men are also three times more prone to suicide than women, with a life expectancy that is five times shorter.
These numbers can be minimized if men can have safe spaces to learn how to be vulnerable without it being seen as a sign of weakness. A men’s cuddling group meetup offers the perfect space for men to move beyond restrictive definitions of masculinity with the avenue to seek professional help for those that feel they need more help.
Men’s Cuddling Groups Are a Growing Movement
Unlike professional cuddling services where people pay to cuddle, most cuddling groups are free to join and are closed groups, making them private. Most cuddling groups hold interviews for any new inquirer before they are approved to ensure they are the right fit for the group.
These types of groups are influenced by other men’s support groups like the MKP and MensGroup that offer emotional support to members for different men’s needs. These groups promote the idea of openness and vulnerability amongst men, which are the values expressed in cuddling groups. Asking for affection, help, and time from other men is scary. However, it is an important skill for men to learn to become better men. This is what a cuddling group teaches.
In a men’s cuddling group, you will notice how physical touch comes naturally to men. Members absentmindedly touch each other’s ears or chins and even hurdle together to be close to each other while lying on the floor, which is a big part of allowing men to be open to platonic physical touch and closeness.
Men’s cuddling groups are slowly gaining momentum and trending, with more meetings cropping up in different parts of America and more publicity created by writers like Aneri Pattani.
On the other hand, if you’re looking for Healing Circles, then join mensgroup.com today!
Information About Men’s Group
Men’s Group is an online-based men’s group that offers support, advice, and help to men from all lifestyles. As an online-based men’s group, you can become part of this ever-growing community, whether you live in New York or Philly, the United Kingdom, or the furthest corner of the world. MensGroup facilitates several on-line men’s support programs, ensuring there is a group for every man.
If you are new to men’s support groups, MensGroup offers the perfect setting to attend a support group meeting for the first time and acquaint yourself with how these groups function. This will give you the confidence you need to dive into a Men’s cuddling group if you feel the need for one.
When you join MensGroup, you will be placed in a group with men who can relate to your experiences, whether you are a retiree or a younger man. This ensures you have a safe space where you can freely share, make friends and learn. Being a man can be lonely, and being part of a men’s social group can be the change you have long searched for. You can check the website for upcoming events.
Conclusion
At a time when the world is becoming increasingly aware of the importance of talking about male mental health, men’s support groups offer the best insight into the world of male feelings.
More importantly, a men’s cuddling group is proof that men, too, can foster healthy male friendships, talk candidly about their emotions and be there for one another. This has been proven to have profound benefits to their mental health. If you need a great men’s group, you can become part of one at mensgroup.com.
*Sources: 1. Men’s cuddling group aims to redefine masculinity and heal trauma 2. Dad says cuddling a group of 15 men saved his marriage 3. Group cuddling sounds ludicrous, but every man should try it 4. Plymouth Meeting’s Men-Only Group Aims To Heal Through Power Of Cuddling 5. Do real men like to cuddle?
